Living On Faith; While Dealing With What God Has Put In Front Of You

Hello everyone...my prayers are with you all...I have a tough blog to tackle here, BUT once again this isn't about me personally, BUT my life in Christ. Most of you know about the my diagnosis that took place earlier this year, but I need to cross this bridge for me and you. My hope is that you will be put at ease about where I am at in my life presently. In March of this year...actually March 12 to be exact, I was told that I have ALS. This is an incurable disease that is attacking my nervous system and it is the medical professions belief that I will eventually die from this disease. MAN!! Just how much worse of a diagnosis could someone ever expect to hear in their life? I have to admit...THIS was numbing to hear and of course the first people to come to my mind were my sons...how was I going to tell them that I had gotten this diagnosis? My Mother and Father were next to surface and all my siblings followed closely behind them. Next came my friends and all the people I love in this world. Shock...was what I was going through. But these were my first thoughts. My oldest brother, my sister and my sister-in-law were there alongside me...and that helped ease the blow of these words...NOT to mention that it was my brother's birthday and we were going out to celebrate that. I would deal with this later.

Now this is where I could go into an in-depth reflection of how I felt, what this disease is and what the "medical profession" say it will do to me during the rest of my time here on earth. However, they obviously don't run with the same crowd I do, because the people I run with know in their heart of heart's that only God decides just when your time is up here on earth. Trust me, I am not being cocky here, BUT, I have never felt like this was "the end" for me, and I don't to this day. I feel as if God is just beginning to work here in my life and He expects me to be around for a while longer...I MAY be totally wrong here and I am ready for that "IF" that is what He desires of me. That is the way I have felt in my heart since I have gotten this diagnosis.

LOL..I have to laugh because one of my dearest friends told me, (before we got this diagnosis), that he felt like God figured I had talked enough in this lifetime...LOL...We laughed and laughed about this because if you know me...like he knows me...you know that I can weave a tale and I love doing just that!..lol...But, after quite a bit of reflection and prayer on this statement...I believe that God may have given this thought to my friend. LOL...God never takes us to a place where isn't going to deliver us from...true statement. We may not like what is happening to us, we may have had different plans...but God is in the driver seat here. He has ways of reminding us about that...AND He will, IF He decides that we need to be reminded.

So; I have been reminded Lord, what do You want of me? I am here for You to mold into any form that You need. Even in this diagnosis I have been able to find a silver lining. I say this because while my diagnosis is a horrible one - there are worse ones out there. There is a different form of ALS that is even more aggressive. The type I have is known as Bulbar ALS, it starts out in the throat and vocal chords. It effects my ability to swallow and speak, so in this I feel as if I am blessed!! I could have had the more aggressive type of ALS. I would like to impress on you that there are silver linings all around us. All we have to do is to be open- minded and to always look for that silver lining. It may seem bleak for you at that moment, but God has a plan for us all...and He is in the driver seat. So let Him drive. Now, getting back to what my friend said...I am truly moved by this and I truly feel that God is at work here. I continuously think about what He wants me to do and I believe that it is to write. So, this is what I am going to do. I believe that God had to shut me up, so I could hear Him...plain and simple. He is in control here, more now than ever.I depend on Him more and more every day. He is my source, The Creator of my blessings, my Light at the end of the tunnel. I will be sharing more with you about this and how God is working through me, effecting peoples lives like I could never have imagined, but He coud and did.

until next time...

Father God you and You alone are my source for everything that is in my life...and I thank You for being there for me. I look to You for my every need Father God...I love You more than life itself, and I know that You will not let me down. I come to You today asking that You will continue to show me the way, to be my personal guide from now on until I am no longer needed here...when I will be able to walk along side of You in that field of clover, and to give me the strength to continue down the path that You have in store for me...so that I will not falter or stray from that path...these things I pray to You my Heavenly Father in Jesus' name, Amen